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Post by juju on Jun 3, 2020 12:33:21 GMT
I know this is a perennial problem, but what should we do with Facebook 'friends' whose views are not so great? Unfriend or keep them, hoping that they might see your alternative viewpoint?
I have an acquaintanc who was a childhood friend (who is also a cousin of a closer friend), who grew up in the UK but moved to Florida with her parents as a teen.
She has put something really unpleasant about how the BLM protesters should be dealt with. I don't care if I never see her posts again, and I know I could unfollow her, but that's not the point - it's merely turning my feed into an echo chamber. And if I unfriend her, I'm contributing to hers becoming an echo chamber too.
But it's really, really pissed me off. 😡
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Post by Kye on Jun 3, 2020 13:02:31 GMT
Tell her how you feel. She may unfriend YOU. People like to surround themselves with like-minded others. If we can challenge each other in love we all grow. But if we challenge each other in hatred, fear and disdain we just become defensive and more entrenched in our own views.
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Post by tangent on Jun 3, 2020 20:50:58 GMT
I have Facebook friends who have polar opposite political views but they are always polite and respectful, and because of that I feel I am more able to understand right-wing viewpoints even if I don't agree with them. But it would be very different if they were filled with hatred, fear and disdain.
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Post by whollygoats on Jun 3, 2020 22:30:50 GMT
I have Facebook friends who have polar opposite political views but they are always polite and respectful, and because of that I feel I am more able to understand right-wing viewpoints even if I don't agree with them. But it would be very different if they were filled with hatred, fear and disdain. Oh, they are filled with hatred, fear and distain. They just cover it when they converse with you because they think you sympathetic to their views. They think you will come to their views....eventually. You are not black or brown, ergo they think you a possible ally. It must be nice to be taken for a potential bigot. I'm glad you get along with them....I guess we'll find out, in the longer haul, whether they, or you, are more correct in outlook. So far, you're in the 'there are decent people on both sides' paradigm, just like our esteemed fuckwit bad precedent. Is that progress for you?
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Post by tangent on Jun 3, 2020 22:59:22 GMT
Oh, they are filled with hatred, fear and disdain. They just cover it when they converse with you because they think you sympathetic to their views. They think you will come to their views....eventually. You are not black or brown, ergo they think you a possible ally. We will have to disagree on whether they are filled with hatred, fear and disdain. I don't think they are. Most of their posts are made to their other friends and not to me and so I see them just as they are. There is no cover-up. And they have shown no sign of trying to convert me. I'm definitely on the other side and always will be.
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Post by whollygoats on Jun 3, 2020 23:21:55 GMT
You can pick your friends.
You can pick your nose.
But you can't pick your friend's nose.
Well, you can, but they've gotta cooperate.
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Post by JoeP on Jun 4, 2020 19:20:59 GMT
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Post by Moose on Jun 4, 2020 21:18:11 GMT
Haha love that meme.
Honestly, part of the reason I started a new facebook page was that I was just sick to the back teeth of the old one ... hundreds of gaming friends with stupid views. I could've just blocked them but I felt like a complete change.
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Post by kingedmund on Jun 6, 2020 15:46:11 GMT
I just learned the other day how to unfollow so now I can get on Facebook. That way I now see family stuff mostly. The ones that talk about family or their day only. I put my facebook back the way it used to be years ago so now maybe I’ll frequent it more.
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Post by Moose on Jun 6, 2020 22:49:03 GMT
It can be useful. I am a bit tired of facebook atm to be honest.
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Post by kingedmund on Jun 8, 2020 20:44:49 GMT
I was tired of it years ago. Now that I found unfollow I don’t have to see the people that post endless political junk every 5 minutes. I can now see the people I never see on their that post pics of their trips or kids or dally life. Or garage sale finds. Or other cool whatnot.
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Post by Kye on Jun 8, 2020 20:49:23 GMT
I really love my daughter's best friend. I married her and her husband a few years ago with great joy. But I've had to unfollow her on Facebook because she's an absolutely fanatical vegan and animal rights proponent. I couldn't take another pic of tortured cows...
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Post by Moose on Jun 8, 2020 21:21:09 GMT
Oh God yeah I have a few of those. It's not that i don't care it's just that .. what am I supposed to do about it? I unfollowed someone when they posted a pic of animals being boiled alive. Yes it's horrific. No, I can't stop it happening.
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Post by Mari on Jun 9, 2020 9:56:49 GMT
My cousin is like that. She was blocked. So are 2 religious cousins. I don't think I have to be converted. Now one of them spams our family WhatsApp every so often with a song or video. She means well, but it's annoying.
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Post by Moose on Jun 9, 2020 21:48:33 GMT
Thankfully I don't really have any religious relatives
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Post by Elis on Jun 10, 2020 8:22:02 GMT
Years ago I had an American friend from a forum who believed Obama was the antichrist (seriously? After people like Hitler, the antichrist was supposed to be Obama?) and was very much against Muslims. When she posted something along the lines of all Muslims should be killed, I wrote to her and expressed how shocked I was since she claimed to be a Christian. She apologized, but still kept posting hateful things, so I undfriended her. We ran into each other a few years later in a Facebook-group where she wrote hhorrible things about a friend we both had and when I addressed that, she attacked me. Since then, we haven't talked our run into each other anywhere and I'm glad.
My father and I are members of a small, German Christian chat group. We all met on forums which were getting too crazy and so my father and another friend founded the group and started to invite people they trusted. There is a flat earther in there who is into conspiracy theories (the moon landing never happened, chemtrails etc.), but there are enough people in there who oppose him. Sometimes there can be heated discussions annd I have been close to leaving because of him, but he hasn't been racist or hateful, so we deal with it. Still, two days ago there was a heated discussion which got my father quite angry as well and there are times when it is tough.
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Post by tangent on Jun 10, 2020 12:06:26 GMT
When I was at university, our maths social group invited a flat earther to give a talk - there were no conspiracy theories at the time. I well remember he made a well-intentioned presentation and the society group took it very well and asked polite questions without a hint of ridicule. Things are so different now. It seems the Internet has brought out the worst in many people. We can be as rude as we like if we're anonymous or at least hiding behind a screen.
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Post by Moose on Jun 10, 2020 21:46:50 GMT
Was that a Wardrobian Claudia? There were some right nut jobs there.
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Post by Elis on Jun 11, 2020 9:05:38 GMT
Was that a Wardrobian Claudia? There were some right nut jobs there. No, she was from a completely different forum where some women with psychological problems had gathered. Some I am still friends with today and she was nice enough when we were talking ablut our problems and everyday stuff.
I can't really remember nut jobs on the Wardrobe. Not sure if they were in areas I didn't spend much time in or if I have forgotten about them.
I still miss the Wardrobe, btw. and have lost cotact with a a few people I liked on there.
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Post by Kye on Jun 11, 2020 10:07:40 GMT
Back in the Wardrobe days I was very new to Christianity and some of the people there, even some of the conservative Christians, were very helpful to me. It's almost 20 years later and I look back on those days and marvel at my spiritual and theological ignorance.
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Post by tangent on Jun 11, 2020 11:44:54 GMT
I still miss the Wardrobe, btw. and have lost contact with a few people I liked on there. There is a Wardrobe group on Facebook and some of us (including Carol) met recently on Zoom.
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Post by Elis on Jun 11, 2020 11:46:50 GMT
That sounds nice. I might be in that one, but I think I haven't checked it in a while. What was Carol's name on the Wardrobe?
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Post by tangent on Jun 11, 2020 11:51:14 GMT
I don't know. Probably Carol. Jo would know.
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Post by JoeP on Jun 11, 2020 14:28:05 GMT
Back in the Wardrobe days I was very new to Christianity And now look at you!
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Post by Moose on Jun 11, 2020 23:13:22 GMT
Carol was Coracle I think In the early days the Wardrobe was mostly moderate Christians but the films coming out seemed to bring the whackaddodles out of the woodwork. There was also a small but enthusiastic Creationist brigade .. some of who I actually do still count as friends though we do not talk about that subject
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Post by Kye on Jun 12, 2020 0:33:14 GMT
I always remember Adam Lehrer (sp?) from those days. I wonder whatever happened to him...
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Post by Moose on Jun 12, 2020 1:10:11 GMT
I was in touch with him on facebook for a while and then he disappeared. Nice guy. Came out as gay.
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Post by Kye on Jun 12, 2020 9:55:44 GMT
Yes, I remember how tortured he was about it. His stupid church!
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Post by Moose on Jun 12, 2020 21:25:33 GMT
He totally backed away from that lol
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Post by Kye on Jun 12, 2020 21:40:04 GMT
Good!
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