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Post by Moose on Mar 9, 2013 2:49:36 GMT
I just get error messages  |
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Post by jayme on Mar 9, 2013 13:39:49 GMT
Bummer. Another attempt: |
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Post by Kye on Mar 9, 2013 18:14:02 GMT
Works for me.
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Post by Moose on Mar 9, 2013 18:14:29 GMT
I need to update flash or something apparently
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Post by Deleted on Mar 10, 2013 22:27:38 GMT
I would just get a more or less anonymous funeral and grave at the moment, as far as I know. That happens when you've left the church. Should I actually think about my funeral at my age? Wouldn't want to be cremated I think, I have a difficult relationship with fire.
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Post by tangent on Mar 10, 2013 22:45:51 GMT
Should I actually think about my funeral at my age? No, you have plenty of time to think of it later. I'm not thinking about it. Difficult relationship with fire? |
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Post by Deleted on Mar 10, 2013 22:47:46 GMT
I'm scared of fire and can't watch anything in which people are burning, even if it's just a film.
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Post by Moose on Mar 10, 2013 23:17:21 GMT
Kaylee me too. I really hated the idea of my dad being burned and it caused me some grief in the days before the funeral but I did not want to say too much to my family as crem seemed to be the consensus and it was a fair bit cheaper and ultimately I was not paying. Now it's actually happened I feel a bit better but I've still been having nasty dreams
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2013 7:26:52 GMT
It's one of the things that have always scared me. Although I guess that if I die one day and my family should decide in favour of cremation, I wouldn't care as long as I didn't know it while I was alive.
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Post by Mari on Mar 11, 2013 10:27:50 GMT
Should I actually think about my funeral at my age? No, you have plenty of time to think of it later. I'm not thinking about it. That is just playing ostrich. You can die at any age you know. Thinking about your funeral is a good idea, though you don't have to make actual preparations for it. Just tell someone what you would like and save those staying behind a lot of practical thinking they really don't want to have to do when they just lost their beloved... you. |
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Post by tangent on Mar 11, 2013 10:51:23 GMT
Yes, maybe.
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Post by juju on Mar 11, 2013 16:31:25 GMT
Funerals are for the living rather than the dead. They are about what is meaningful for them about a person, and how they celebrate that person, so to be honest, I'll have whatever my family thinks would be good to remember me by. Having said that, I'd be curious to know what that would be - I may ask one day.  |
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Post by Moose on Mar 11, 2013 16:54:21 GMT
They might have you decapitated and speared on top of London Bridge  |
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Post by Moose on Mar 11, 2013 16:55:13 GMT
To be perfectly honest I rather suspect that my dad would have said that it was all a waste of time and would have fainted at the cost, only about two thirds of which was covered by his insurance policy. But he'd have been touched by my brother's eulogy I think.
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Post by Alvamiga on Mar 11, 2013 21:11:10 GMT
One of my uncles died in a motoring accident when he was only 18. Tracy was a week before her 27th birthday. It's something to consider, but not rely on happening sooner rather than later. I keep meaning to be more organised after what happened with Tracy, but I still regularly put it off as it's not a fun thing to think about really.  |
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Post by Moose on Mar 11, 2013 21:22:04 GMT
My dad died intestate. I gather that my mum made a will just a cpl months before he did, when she was very ill.. am glad I did not know that at the time |
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Post by Alvamiga on Mar 11, 2013 21:26:13 GMT
Being married, it would hardly be a problem, but in my case, people could have made things very difficult if they had wanted to if they had decided to claim rights on Tracy's stuff. I had documents for a reciprocal will, but they kept going AWOL round the house and not getting filled in. |
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Post by Mari on Mar 11, 2013 21:55:11 GMT
I have been watching heir hunters on bbc one the last. two weeks. It's fascinating yet heartwrenching.
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Post by tangent on Mar 11, 2013 22:10:57 GMT
One of main the main reasons for having a will is to prevent the need for a solicitor to sort it out and charge your estate lots of money.
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Post by Moose on Mar 11, 2013 22:11:16 GMT
Being married, it would hardly be a problem, but in my case, people could have made things very difficult if they had wanted to if they had decided to claim rights on Tracy's stuff. I had documents for a reciprocal will, but they kept going AWOL round the house and not getting filled in. Given that you paid for every penny of her funeral I would imagine that any 'people' who might have wanted to do that would have been unwise indeed. |
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Post by Alvamiga on Mar 12, 2013 8:11:49 GMT
Yes, but even "simple" things such as getting the bank to give back the £40-ish pounds in her account (which I had put in there) and shut it down took 5 attempts and about 3 years to get them to actually listen and do it. Even then, it was only as her executor. I wasn't even legally able to be the person to register her death, apart from being "present at the death" which was very upsetting. Fortunately, I had dragged one of her brothers along with me to the registrar's office an he was able to sign the relevant bits. |
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Post by tangent on Mar 12, 2013 9:46:06 GMT
That's strange, I had no trouble dealing with my uncle's bank.
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Post by Moose on Mar 12, 2013 17:29:07 GMT
You had right of attorney though didn't you?
This is a strong reason in favour of gay marriage btw - because ultimately, even if they spend sixty years together same sex couples as it stands are simply not automatically the next of kin
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Post by tangent on Mar 12, 2013 19:59:57 GMT
Yes, but I always thought it was because I had an honest face |
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Post by Shake on Mar 13, 2013 5:57:02 GMT
I'd prefer it be non-religious, but since I won't be around to complain, I suppose they can do whatever they want.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2013 8:59:59 GMT
I have actually been considering joining the church again and one reason is that, if I didn now, I would not be allowed to have a religious funeral and I think that would break my family's heart. I am a Christian, so I'd like to be entitled to certain Christian rituals. A regular guest of the bar I work in died two years ago and his mother was devastated because he couldn't even be burried next to his dad because he'd left the church. All he got was an anonymous grave and an anonymous funeral.
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Post by tangent on Mar 13, 2013 11:01:56 GMT
That's very sad. I hope you find what you are wanting in a Christian church.
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Post by Kye on Mar 13, 2013 11:32:26 GMT
I was asked to do a funeral a couple of years ago for a man who had committed suicide. The parents were devastated because their own (Orthodox) church refused to do the service.
I found it pretty cold that a church would refuse to minister to a family that were obviously in an enormous amount of pain.
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Post by Mari on Mar 13, 2013 12:39:37 GMT
I have never heard of anything like that here. Iam not a member of the church right now, but I doubt the church would refuse my funeral. Also, cemeteries are owned by the city, so religion hasnothing to do with the burial.
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Post by Moose on Mar 13, 2013 16:47:34 GMT
My dad was not a member of a church and yet the vicar never even asked. It's pretty much the done thing here to have a C of E funeral.
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